Washington Wizards: 4 free agent quidditch players who could magically cure the Wizards next season

There’s no getting around it. The Washington Wizards need to significantly improve their roster this offseason if they hope to contend next year. Bradley Beal is approaching free agency, Russell Westbrook isn’t getting younger, and the Wizards were hapless in the first round against a Philadelphia team whose second star won’t shoot the ball.

All that in mind, there is hope in the free-agent market. But why not take a closer look at some foreign players available in a more magical free-agent market than the one the NBA has to offer.

One important thing to note: magic is not allowed in basketball, so these analyses are strictly based on the athletic prowess of each wizard. Now, let’s get to the free agents who could bring a little magic to the Wizards sideline.

Four free agent quidditch players who could magically cure the Washington Wizards next season.

1. Oliver Wood
This is an easy choice. The Wizards need to improve their defense, and a veteran keeper like Wood would be a welcome addition. He’s seasoned, measured, and an experienced leader who will be a mature voice in the locker room. You could argue he didn’t become a winner until Harry Potter came along, but that doesn’t negate the skills he brings to the table.

The downside would be his size. After all, there are no brooms in basketball, which means he couldn’t fly from one end of the court to the other, but the instincts are there. There will be a learning curve when it comes to the speed of the game, and he will have to get used to working up and down both sides of the court, but who knows? Maybe Wood can become the Wizards’ version of Bruce Brown.

2. Ginny Weasley
How could you not want Ginny Weasley on your team? Not only is she a versatile offensive weapon who played both chaser and seeker for the Gryffindor quidditch team, but her resume includes professional playing time with the Holyhead Harpies. Ginny has faced the toughest opponents, from cheating Slytherins to the Tom Marvolo Riddle, illustrating she has the kind of guts that could inspire the Wizards to reach their full potential.

The only concern would be whether or not she has anything left in the tank. Years of any sport can weigh on the body, and who’s to say she can be as effective as she once was? No one will discount her work ethic or determination, but Father Time is undefeated, and considering the scores of injuries this season, are the miles on Ginny Weasley worth the risk?

3. Viktor Krum
Maybe Krum should’ve been my first pick. He’s a prodigy who led his national team to the Quidditch World Cup at only eighteen years old (when he was still a student at the Durmstrang Institute). As a seeker, he values the ball and will bring a Westbrook-like motor to the court. He’s a proven winner, one this Washington Wizards team so desperately needs.

However, there isn’t much of a track record of Bulgarians having any success in the NBA. That doesn’t mean they can’t, but their national teams don’t have a rich history of winning, and while Krum is a genius on the quidditch pitch, his development on the court might not fit into the timeline of the Westbrook-Beal pairing.

4. George Weasley
Just as Markieff Morris brought a much-needed ruggedness to the 2016 Wizards, George Weasley is another twin with a willingness to get dirty. As a beater, he has a proven knack for defense on both ends of the pitch and would be game for punishing opposing guards who try to get too cute (looking at you, Trae Young).

He isn’t much of a scoring threat, though, so he’d be more D and less 3. Additionally, he was at his best when he played alongside his twin brother Fred, who isn’t around now since he died in the Battle of Hogwarts. Who knows what kind of player he’ll be on his own?

Honorable Mentions

• Cedric Diggory – deceased
• Fred Weasley – deceased
• Katie Bell – easily tricked
• Cho Chang – retired
• Angelina Johnson – Excellent chaser and married to George Weasley, but as a former captain, unsure if she would accept her role as a number three or even four.
• Harry Potter – very skilled seeker and proven champion, but trouble seems to follow him wherever he goes, and given the history of the Wizards, not sure his presence in the locker room would be a good idea.